11.19.2010

Forty Seven No More



Papang.

One of the sweetest words I've heard. One of the sweetest pet names I've been called. From one of the sweetest persons I've met... Si Placida.

Back in high school, usong uso sa Kada namin yung anak-anak, tatay-tatay, mama-mama, pami-pamilya. May mga clan pa kami, mga AMA at STI. Ang Mapuputing Angkan VS Samahan ng Taong Itim. Di ko na maalala pano ko naging anak si Placie at si Joselyn (fondly called Bato or Tysona). Basta silang dalawa ang mga anak-anakan ko.

I remember how I met Placie. Second year yun, mula section 11 ata, nalipat sha sa min sa section 1. Tahimik, humble, mahiyain, pero maganda. Di sha gaanong nakikihalubilo sa mga eksena ng Kada, pero kalog at makulit sa mga ka-close nya. Pasimpleng kulet.

Di ko sure kung sa Journal class ba kami naging close, or talagang epal lang ako sa lahat kaya pati sha na mahiyain at walang kadaldalan sa katawan eh naging kaibigan ko. Naging anak ko nga sha, pati si Bato. Pero lagi nyang kine-claim na ampon daw si Bato kasi hindi raw kasing ganda nya.

I used to know her as low-profile and shy. Pero sobrang ginulat nya ko nung minsan na school program, at kumanta sha onstage ng "You Ought to Know By Now" ni Ateng Angela Bofill. Grabe! Pak na pak! Talagang boses anghel si anak! Proud father ang drama ko, kahit ako naloka kung gano kaganda ang boses ni Placie.

During our fourth year sa hayskul, lahat ata kami eh nag-test sa PLM. Yung entrance exam na dapat eh December, na-move daw ng January. Tapos last minute eh binalik daw sa original date ng December. Eh karamihan sa Kada eh hindi alam yun, specially Placie. Ayun, sumugod ako sa bahay nya to inform her. At nakikain pa ata ako ng fish ball at squid ball.

Hindi sha laging sumasama sa lakad namin ng Kada, kasi super bait nga. Bahay-school-church lang ang normal routine ng lola mo. Pero dun sa mga importanteng lakad ng buong klase, kasama naman sha. Bale 47 kami sa klase. Ang motto pa eh "All IV-1, One for All!" Lahat ata ng hayskul na section 1 yun ang motto.

Mas naging close kami ni Placie nung 4th year, kasi pareho kaming soprano sa choir. Ay sha lang pala ang soprano, ako pala bass. Sa ilalim ng pamumuno ni Ginang Teresita Nicdao, at sa gabay at patnubay ni Ginang Alibudbud, bonggang bonggang choir talaga ang role namin sa buhay. Dun din sa choir nabuo ang Divas, kaming limang beki na puro emotera sa kantahan.

Sa UST Conservatory of Music sha nag-enrol. Akengkay naman ay sa PLM muna. Basta classmate daw nya si Aiza Seguerra sa UST, at classmate ko naman si Jimboy sa PLM ahihihi... Pag nagkikita kami eh super dalang na. Basta once naisama ko sha sa party-partyhan namin ng Kada. Sinundo ko pa sa haus nila at hinatid ko pa pauwi.

Nung isang beses din eh nagkasalubong kami sa Baguio. Umatend sha ng convention nila at camp sa church, ako naman eh kasamang naglamyerda ng pamilya ko para umatend ng burol at maglakwatsa na rin. Dahil nga nagkasalubong kami, nagtake advantage na ang anak ko at piktyur-piktyur kami sa The Mansion. Mega polo pa naman ako nun na anaconda inspired kaya panalo talaga ang pose! Nanghingi pa sha ng autograph bago kami naghiwalay ahihihi.

Placie is a real servant of God. Her spirituality is what makes her so pure and simple. Ilang beses nya kong inimbitahan sa mga bible studies, praise and worship, at church services nila. Isang beses ko lang sha napagbigyan. Di ko kasi gano naiintindihan ang system at beliefs ng simbahan nila, pero I felt grateful kasi alam kong she was trying to save me. In more ways than one, she did save me.

We drifted off after that. Basta nawalan na kami ng communication. There are those obligatory Christmas and birthday greetings, some customary his and hellos, a few exchanges of text messages. Sa frenster naging connected din kami. Pero nung nawala na sa uso ang frendster, nawala na rin ata sa uso ang friendship namin.

October nang magparamdam sa kin si Bato.



Wala. Na. Nasagasaan. Motor. Dead. On. The. Spot. July. Placie.

Di ko ma-process. Di nagsi-sink in sa utak ko yung nabasa ko. Parang biglang natahimik ang mundo, at nakatitig lang ako sa screen ng laptop. Habang nakatitig ako sa monitor, unti unting pumatak ang luha ko. Pero initial reaction lang pala yun.

Galit na galit ako. Minura ko lahat ng walangyang motorista. Isinumpa ko lahat ng barubal na drayber. Kinasuklaman ko lahat ng harabas na magpatakbo ng motor. For my friend to die because of a vehicle that small, gano kalakas kaya yung impact non? Nabagok ba sha, tumilapon, gano kalakas ba yung damage na magagawa ng motor?!

After I learned what happened, nag-send ako ng group message sa barkada namin. Lahat na-shock, may hindi naniwala, may naiyak, may nagulat. Karamihan nanghinayang. She was such a kind soul. She's taken away too soon. And she's gone now. Gone, but not forgotten.

Hinalikwat ko lahat ng mga sulat na inipon ko since elementary. Winarwar ko lahat, sinuyod ko lahat, hanggang mahanap ko yung mga sulat ni Placie sa kin. Mejo natawa pa ko, kasi lahat coupon bond na nilagyan ng crayolang boarder. Me underline pang red ballpen para guideline ata. Me tupi-tupi pa na pang-origami ang dating.

Habang binabasa ko mga sulat nya, naiyak na naman ako... She wrote those letters nung malapit na kaming mag-graduation. Lahat ng sulat nya, iisa lang ang tema: pamamaalam. Goodbye Papang. I will miss you. Take care of yourself.

Those letters were written 11-12 yrs ago. Pero sakto eh. It's as if she prepared me for when this time would come. Ganun siguro talaga pag mabait, di hahayaan ng Dyos na mawala ka ng di nakakapagpaalam sa mga mahal mo sa buhay. Thru those letters, she was able to say goodbye.

Sa kakakalkal ko rin, nakita ko ang isang draft ng letter na di ko naipadala sa kanya. It was a poem I composed for her before our graduation. High school ko pa sinulat to. Ngayon nya lang mababasa. I guess, undeserving as I am, I am also given this chance to bid her farewell.


Even if the sky is green, even if the rain is sunshine,
Even if the waters aren't fine, you'll still be a friend of mine.
You'll still be my star, you'll still be my guide,
You'll still be with me inside, even if we're far apart.
You'll stay for the rest of my life, you'll be forever alive,
You'll still help me in times of strife, although alone I have to survive.
I'll be alone coz you're not there, I'll be alone coz you're far away,
I'll be alone but I'll always care.
Like a recorder, our memories will forever play.

Anak, di ko naman kineri na gone too soon ang drama mo. But I know this is a part of God's plan for us. If it's His will, sino ba ko para kumontra? I believe you're in a better place. I can't wait to join you there Anak, but for now I have to stay here for awhile. Someday Placie, our roads will meet again. Makilala mo kaya ako?



Sa mga nagbabasa ng blog na to ngayon, I'd lke to propose a toast. To Placida. A pretty face, a beautiful soul, a warm heart, a full life. May you rest in His peace forever. Mahal ka ng Papang.

14 comments:

  1. its so sad that she died so young. Maybe she completed hher mission. To touch your heart and others.

    Salute. Toast!

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  2. sad.....but her memories will remain forever!
    cheers!

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  3. our HS batch just lost a good and smart friend dahil sa isang brain problem. hahayyyy... so sad teh!

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  4. Gone too soon...

    Hold tight to memories for comfort BM.

    =)

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  5. Ang sad naman nito. Nakakaiyak. Cheers to Placie!

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  6. She is not totally gone BM cuz you still have her in your heart...

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  7. ang ganda nya.. i smiled nung nakita ko ang picture nya. God has another beautiful angel with Him. nakakapanghinayang.. but she's in a better place now.

    am sorry pero F sa mga drivers ng kung anumang sasakyan ang minamaneho na walang pakialam. isa silang big letter F!

    cheers to placie and her memories. power hugs
    >--(",)--<

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  8. this story makes a good eulogy for Placida.

    kalagitnaan ng story, alam ko na there's something na hindi magandang nangyari...

    nevertheless, cheers to Placida...

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  9. nakakalungkot..may God bless her and her family.

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  10. Napa isip ako. What if I also regret not seeing some of my friends as often as I should? We are often guilty of taking life for granted.

    Baklang Maton in the Suburbs, I am sorry for your loss. I don't know if you are mourning more for all the good times you had, or the times you didn't have. Perhaps, it is always both.

    =(

    I join you in your toast. Para kay Placida. She must have been something for you to love her this much.

    Kane

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  11. am a biker myself, but a prolife above all else. ang tagal ko nang di lumuluha, ngayon lang uli. ikaw kasi baklang maton e.

    a big, big F to those reckless bikers!

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  12. when i saw her pic i was thinking siya yung nakasakay ko sa plane kanina... so i read back and discover her being dead so maybe di sya yun...

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